This weekβs challenge asks us to share a period in our lives when we seized the opportunity to try to get away with something.
βOh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.β That phrase by the famous author Sir Walter Scott is so very true, especially in this scenario.
It all began when my boyfriend Bill (now husband) and I along with his brother Jim and girlfriend Lynne (now wife) came up with the idea of going away for a little weekend of hanky panky. Why we felt the need to get away is a mystery; I suppose being away from home made it exciting and naughty. We were doing just fine in the hanky panky department at home but we were rebellious teenagers who acted first and thought later.
We told our parents we were going skiing in Kingston, New York β about a 2-hour drive from where we lived in The Bronx. The first blazing red flag for my parents should have been the fact that I did not ski. If they had any doubts at that time about the validity of our story, they said nothing; I probably told them I was going to take ski lessons since Bill, Jim and Lynne all knew how to ski.
The brilliant plan we came up with was to tell our parents that Lynne and I would share one room while Bill and Jim stayed in another. In hindsight I canβt help but wonder why my parents would believe such a flimsy story. Whatβs even more incredible is they let me go! Maybe they just relaxed a bit after already raising one daughter who was a saint compared to me.
When the day of our get-away finally arrived, we drove up to Kingston and checked into our hotel. After a bit of alone time in our rooms to unwind from the drive, we all went out to dinner. I remember ordering a sloe gin fizz cocktail and a ridiculously rich steak dish smothered in a creamy mushroom gravy.
*At this point it’s only fair that I inform you, dear readers, that rich and creamy gravy goes through me like a freight train. TMI, I know, but it’s necessary info for this story. I can feel my stomach churning as I write this.*
After dinner we returned to the hotel and all hung out together in Jim and Lynne’s room for a while before heading off to our own room. A couple of hours later I woke Bill up complaining of intense stomach pains. I was in a bad way and he decided to take me right to the hospital. Not wanting to disturb Jim and Lynne, Bill and I went alone. If only we had stayed in our room and let nature take its course. These things have a way of resolving themselves but at the time it seemed more serious than it was and our impulsive nature took over.
After arriving at the hospital and explaining the situation, I was politely but sternly refused treatment because I was underage and there was no adult present to sign any necessary forms. Sick as I was, I was cognizant enough to realize this could be problematic. In other words, we were up the creek without a paddle. There was even talk of notifying my parents. This meant trouble.
DUM DA DUM DUM!! The tangled web was becoming a knotted mess.
Well, this is something hospital personnel see all the time β kids out for some fun without their parentβs consent β and they cut me a little slack. Determining I had nothing more serious than a bad stomachache, they still refused to treat me but they gave me access to a private bathroom. Bill managed to get his hands on some Pepto Bismol at the drugstore across the street and after a while I started feeling better. We returned to the hotel a little while after Jim and Lynne had woken up; they were very surprised to find out I had gotten sick.
Even though I was feeling better, I wasnβt up to our weekend get-away and we all reluctantly agreed to return home. There was no need to come up with an excuse; we would simply tell our parents the truth β that I wasnβt feeling well and we came home early; however, we left out the little bit about the hospital.
Our parents were surprised to see us but agreed we did the right thing by coming home. Everything was going smoothly until later that night as we sat in Bill and Jimβs kitchen talking about our abbreviated weekend trip. Lynne inadvertently said βYeah, Jim and I were surprised to find out Nancy had gotten sick; she looked fine when we left Bill’s room last night.β
Liar, liar! Pants on fire! The knotted web now had us in a stranglehold.
Of course, Lynne immediately realized her gaffe but it was too late. She sat in horrified silence, a nauseous feeling coming over her. Bill and Jimβs mother realized we had not been in separate rooms and the disappointed look on her face was too much for Lynne to bear; she quickly got up and went into another room. Bill managed to come up with an explanation to cover what Lynne said but weβre sure his mother only pretended to believe it.
I donβt know for sure if my parents ever found out about that night in Kingston; I have to believe they didnβt because I never would have heard the end of it if they knew. But was it just a coincidence that I was forbidden to attend Woodstock a few months later? That was never, under any circumstances, ever going to happen. There was no getting around that one.
I learned a lesson that weekend how quickly things can go wrong and how easily someoneβs trust can be lost, even if temporarily.
It took me a hell of a lot longer to realize there are certain foods I couldnβt eat and drinks I couldnβt drink. After too many years of ‘discomfort in the lower tract’, I finally wised up and changed my crazy eating habits but I never lost my rebellious and daring spirit. I just learned to temper it.
Thanks to an similar story by my friend John Holton (see below), Iβm submitting this post to Fandangoβs One Word Challenge. The prompt word is βchopβ. Iβm also feeling mixed emotions for I see our recently departed friend Hobbo commented on my story when I originally wrote it last year. RIP Hobbo.
This hairy hand is not mine!
When I became pregnant with my first baby in 1977, my husband Bill and I were over the moon! We were thrilled and dove headfirst into the whole pregnancy phenomenon β buying furniture and clothes and setting up a nursery. At the time I was 26 years old, weighed 105 pounds and stood 5β4β tall.
Throughout my pregnancy I craved barbecued hamburgers, fresh tomatoes and hot fudge ice cream sundaes every day. After nine months, I gained a whopping 72 pounds and at some point had to remove my weddingβ¦
Greetings to all my wondrous WordPressing friends! It’s incredible how many friends I have made here; your challenges and word prompts etc., are amazingly creative.
When I first started my site in 2017, I figured I’d write a couple of little stories now and then. Well, five years later and one look at my site will show you how that turned out! It took on a life of its own and morphed into Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors.
Not that I’m complaining ….. far from it. My site blossomed and I’m very grateful for all my followers and all the ‘likes’ you give me. Your complimentary and encouraging comments spur me on to be as creative and original as possible.
I’ve been following a lot of you, too, and trying to keep up with all the prompts you post; as much as I’d like to, it’s impossible to participate in and contribute to all of them. If I did, I’d never have time to write my own stories and let’s face it β that is my first love. I’m a storyteller and I think I’ve been neglecting my site just a bit by trying to keep up with all your sites.
Don’t look at me like that; you haven’t even read what I’m going to say!
I have no intention of bailing out on you, my WordPress friends. I just need to cut back a little and try to not spread myself so thin. If something really cool pops out at me on one of your posts (and I’m 100% sure that will happen) then I’ll plunge in and I’ll give it my best shot just like I do with all the stories I write.
This is not goodbye; you can’t get rid of me that easily. I’ll still be stopping by every day checking up on you, reading your poems and stories and taking up a challenge whenever I can.
Keep on keeping on, everyone. You’re the best group of people ever!
Sadje at Sunday Poser # 97 asks the question of the week: “What’s your driving style?’
Based on my driving record β only one moving violation in 45 years β Iβd say Iβm a very good driver. I love to drive and do all the driving. I hate the way Bill drives and he knows it; too heavy on the brake and the choppy ride makes me car sick. Iβm a much better driver than I am a passenger. π₯΄
There isnβt much on the road that scares me but I donβt like those huge car carriers. Iβm sure the cars are securely locked into place but Iβm always thinking βWhat if one slides off right into traffic or the carrier topples over?β Some of those transport drivers are really hauling ass and you can see them swaying back and forth. One jerk of the steering wheel and WATCH OUT!! What a horror show that would be! π³ The best thing for me to do is pass them as safely and quickly as I can and put them behind me. There are a lot of people who are hesitant to pass trucks and buses but Iβm not. Iβd rather be in front of them and as far away as possible. I like seeing where Iβm going when Iβm driving, not staring at the back of some big rig not knowing when it may suddenly STOP! π
There’s another thing Iβm not crazy about and that’s night driving. Bright headlights coming in the opposite direction cause me to squint and tense up, giving me a headache and making for an unpleasant ride. On the other hand driving on a dark country road with no streetlights β just my headlights β can be stress-inducing; encountering a deer in the road is no joke. Itβs kind of freaky when itβs so hard to see, youβre not even sure if your own lights are on! π¦
As long as I’m talking about pet peeves, let’s discuss another thing that gets on my nerves. Where we live we’re allowed to turn right at a red light unless there’s a sign forbidding it.π¦ It’s convenient and saves time; you just stop, make sure it’s safe to turn and go. There’s no law that says you have to turn right on red but it’s awfully rude for the people waiting to turn if the driver in front refuses to do so. What are these non-turners so afraid of? I don’t understand why they insist on waiting for the light to change to green before turning but I don’t honk them; I just sit and stew, quietly cursing them out. π€¬
When Iβm driving around town running errands etc., Iβm very cautious, especially if the grandkids are in the car with me. There are a lot of cars out and about these days and sometimes it feels like Iβm driving in an obstacle course. Besides, you never know when a little kid will dart out into the street. Thereβs a great sign Iβve been seeing around lately; it says βDrive like your kids live hereβ. Now that drives the message home, doesnβt it? π« (no pun intended). It’s important to drive carefully in town but there’s such a thing as driving too slow and Iβm not very patient with the slowpokes. π Sometimes being too slow is as dangerous as being too fast.
When Iβm driving on the highway I admit I tend to drive fast but Iβm not reckless and Iβm in total control at all times. I don’t fiddle with the radio πΆ or eat π or talk on the phone π² when I’m driving. I just mind my own business and keep up with the flow of traffic. Frequently youβll see some big-shot highway stars changing lanes, speeding and weaving in and out of traffic. π Where are they going thatβs so important anyway? However, if someone is going too slow, Iβve been known to tailgate and that makes Bill jittery. π΅βπ« He always says, βIf I see brake lights up ahead and I donβt feel like weβre slowing down, I get nervous.” I can see his foot automatically reaching for the invisible brake by his left foot while his right hand is clutching the door, white knuckles showing. I know what I’m doing but if anyone is nervous while I’m driving, it’s time to slow down and take their feelings into account. I want my passengers to be comfortable, not on edge.
Bill is absolutely right, of course, and I will never fault him for reminding me to back off or slow down. Ever since our major accident more than 20 years ago, I canβt blame him. That was a freak accident and a harrowing experience. If youβd care to read about it, hereβs the link: https://theelephantstrunk.org/2021/12/21/a-roll-of-the-dice/.
Aside from that major accident, I’ve been involved in two minor incidents: on two separate occasions I was rear-ended by school buses on the first day of school in the rain at the exact same location! π What are the odds of that happening? It’s rather mind- boggling! π€― There are few things scarier than looking up at your rearview mirror and seeing a large vehicle barreling down on you. Oh, I forgot to mention the time I was rear ended by some asshole who hit me while I was stopped at a red light. It was a quiet street with no one around, no witnesses. After this idiot hit me, I pulled off to the right to check for damages and he pulled a U-turn and took off! Nice, right? π‘ What’s with all the rear-ending? That’s why Bill warns me about tailgating.
Cars these days come equipped with some amazing features and I make full use of them. I would be lost (literally) without my GPS π€·πΌββοΈ; when I have no idea where I’m going, it’s very reassuring to have a kind voice giving me step by step directions. There’s also the backup camera which is invaluable; I don’t know how I drove for so long without one. The lights on the sideview mirrors which flash and beep when it’s unsafe to change lanes are very helpful, too, especially to warn you about those drivers who love to hide in your blindspot.
Iβm not a risk-taker when Iβm driving but at the same time if Iβm stuck in a jam and I see a way I can safely get myself out of it, I’ll go for it. Getting behind the wheel of a car is a huge leap of faith; we never know what the other guy is gonna do β intentionally or not. There are so many things that can go wrong. Iβve heard itβs safer to fly in a plane than it is to drive a car; I guess I believe that but I feel a whole lot better on solid ground than up in the sky. βοΈ
Drive safely, my friends, and watch out for those rear-enders! They’re a real pain in the ass! π³
Hey! I know that a chick. You know her, too. It’s ME, the artist formerly known as Nancy Richy. Knew I couldn’t fool ya!
Well, it’s never too late to make some changes in life, teach an old dog new tricks, give the house a fresh coat of paint, etc etc.
So, may I introduce to you the scribe you’ve known for all these years β The Sicilian Storyteller! I’ll make you an offer you can’t refuse AND tell you a story at the same time! LOL!!
My website hasn’t changed; only my penname has been altered. It’s your same old friend with a new handle; don’t be afraid to turn that handle and come inside. I don’t bite β well, only those I like. π
Let’s get real: I’m proud of my heritage and the fact that I’m a writer; it’s who I am and what I do so why not go with it?!
Hello, all my friends! See you later! Ciau, tutti amichi! Ni sintemu doppo! ππΌββοΈ
For this weekβs challenge on Song Lyric Sunday weβve been asked to go with novelty songs. I wanted to select two songs that I think some of us more mature bloggers may know, especially those of us of Italian descent.
The first song is βDominick the Donkeyβ sung by Lou Monte, a funny sing-along Christmas record first recorded in 1960. It was brought to modern audiences in 2011, especially in the UK where Chris Moyles gave it regular play on his BBC Radio 1 breakfast show. In the run-up to Christmas of that year, the song reached #3 in the Christmas 2011 UK singles chart. Though βDominic the Donkeyβ reached #3 in the UK, it never charted in the US.
Three years later, Lou Monte saw success with βPeppino, the Italian Mouseβ another novelty song which peaked at #5 in the US. It had entered the Billboard Hot Top 100 Chart on December 2, 1962 and spent 10 weeks on the Top 100.
Here for your enjoyment are both songs.
Hey! Chingedy ching, (hee-haw, hee-haw) It’s Dominick the donkey. Chingedy ching, (hee-haw, hee-haw) The Italian Christmas donkey. (la la la-la la-la la la la la) (la la la-la la-la la-ee-oh-da)
Santa’s got a little friend, His name is Dominick. The cutest little donkey, You never see him kick. When Santa visits his paisons, With Dominick he’ll be. Because the reindeer cannot, Climb the hills of Italy.
Hey! Chingedy ching, (hee-haw, hee-haw) It’s Dominick the donkey. Chingedy ching, (hee-haw, hee-haw) The Italian Christmas donkey. (la la la-la la-la la la la la) (la la la-la la-la la-ee-oh-da)
Jingle bells around his feet, And presents on the sled. Hey! Look at the mayor’s derby, On top of Dominick’s head. A pair of shoes for Louie, And a dress for Josephine. The labels on the inside says, They’re made in Brooklyn.
Hey! Chingedy ching, (hee-haw, hee-haw) It’s Dominick the donkey. Chingedy ching, (hee-haw, hee-haw) The Italian Christmas donkey. (la la la-la la-la la la la la) (la la la-la la-la la-ee-oh-da)
Children sing, and clap their hands, And Dominick starts to dance. They talk Italian to him, And he even understands.
Cumpare sing, Cumpare su, And dance ‘sta tarantel. When jusamagora comes to town, And brings do ciuccianello.
Hey! Chingedy ching, (hee-haw, hee-haw) It’s Dominick the donkey. Chingedy ching, (hee-haw, hee-haw) The Italian Christmas donkey. (la la la-la la-la la la la la) (la la la-la la-la la-ee-oh-da) Hey! Dominick
Writer/s: Ray Allen, Sam Saltzberg, Wandra Merrell Publisher: Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC Lyrics licensed and provided by LyricFind
Pepino, oh, you little mouse, oh, won’t you go away Find yourself another house to run around and play You scare my girl, you eat my cheese, you even drink my wine I try so hard to catch you but you trick me all the time
Cesta no surecillo a basoccella dinda mur Ogna sere quella esce quanda casa scura Endo dindo la cucina balla sulasu A parrano malandrino pura un gabo sapaur
Pepino suracill ana parta scubari Managa suracill a casa ma dai Stasira da cucina nu poco di vino ci au lasciar A quando si briaggo a Pepino giong apa
The other night, I called my girl I asked her could we meet I said, “Let’s go to my house We could have a bite to eat”
And as we walked in through the door She screamed at what she saw There was little Pepino Doin’ the cha, cha on the floor
Pepino suracill ana parta scubari Managa suracill a casa ma dai Stasira da cucina nu poco di vino ci au lasciar A quando si briaggo a Pepino giong apa
Quella non ci piace u formaggio American Quella va trova no poca Parmesan La fatto ghiata ghiat gusto ena cor Quando cella camina para probino caladur
Pepino suracill ana parta scubari Managa suracill a casa ma dai Stasira da cucina nu poco di vino ci au lasciar A quando si briaggo a Pepino giong apa
Just when I think there are no more tears left in me, a thousand more worm their way out of the corners of my eyes and trickle down my cheeks, falling on my breasts as my fingers quiver over the keyboard, its magnetic pull as strong as the waves of a tsunami dragging me to you, to reach out to you and lose myself in your eyes, to dream of your hands on the small of my back drawing me to you, bringing out every passion every woman throughout all of timehas ever known yet realizing if I do so I will lose myself forever and so I drown in tears of sorrow and love and painful resolution; O God, I despise my anguished body which has turned against me so cruelly, I hate these feelings I have for you, and yet I delight in them as I am devoured by the passion you have for me and I die a million times over for I know the pain I suffer will never allow me to be with you again, the only one I truly long for.
When I was a little girl one of the things I dreamed about was some day marrying the most handsome, kindest and bravest man in the world. My little friends and I shared the same dream, as did most girls back then.
We would gather in my yard under Grandpaβs grapevine for the wedding of Barbie and Ken. Barbie was the princess bride; never was there a lovelier creature with her perfect figure and lustrous blonde hair. Her gown was like a million sparkling clouds sewn together and on her head she wore a diamond tiara that twinkled as brightly as her blue eyes.
Ken was her dashing groom β the epitome of elegance without a hair out of place (literally!). His tuxedo was the finest money could buy and his patent leather shoes glistened like the stars in the darkest sky.
Since we always played in my backyard, only my dolls were allowed to be the bride and groom. My little friends would dress up their Barbies in matching gowns of blue velvet to be bridesmaids. One of my other friends was really lucky; she was the only one who had an Allan doll β he was Kenβs best friend and, of course, his best man. She also βborrowedβ her brotherβs G.I. Joe chaplain action figure, a very rare piece indeed, to be the priest. One time my friend accidentally spilled chocolate milk all over the chaplain and when her brother found out, she was never allowed near his stuff again.
We took our Barbie and Ken weddings very seriously; we even had rings which our neighbors Mr. & Mrs. Maroni made for us. One was of shimmering silver thread for Barbie and the other was twisted copper wire for Ken. My mother was the caterer; after the ceremony she provided us with the freshest Hostess Cupcakes and the most delicious Nestleβs Quik. Afterwards Ken and Barbie would ride off in Allanβs convertible with a βJust Marriedβ sign on the back. They would have the perfect marriage, just as all our parents had (or so we thought).
My parents fought just about all the time. From breakfast until the time Dad left for work they would argue about something, then it would all start in again after dinner. Iβd hear them arguing while I did my homework. At night while trying to get to sleep I would hear other noises coming from my parentβs bedroom. They were pretty loud but they definitely werenβt fighting and the next morning they were all smiles. Go figure.
Then one day my friendβs older sister told us we had to have a talk; she was 12 years old and already wearing a bra so we paid attention. That was the infamous day we learned about S-E-X!! Boy, was that an eye-opening monologue; she talked while we all sat there in shock. I was a pretty curious and precocious child so after that talk I figured out darn quick what those noises were from Mom and Dadβs bedroom at night and why they were always so happy when they woke up in the morning.
Right then and there I promised myself when I got married I would fight with my husband as often as I could. I mean, if Mom and Dad were that happy every morning, there had to be something to this sex thing after all.
Chloeβs wedding was planned for the end of the month. As she was being fitted for her gown, she noticed how washed out she looked; the white crepe fabric and her dark brown hair against her pale skin made her look anemic. Chloe decided she would get some highlights in her hair and build up a tan before her big day and honeymoon in Barbados. This was going to be her one and only wedding and she wanted to look stunning.
Chloe heard about a new tanning salon called βBeyond the Paleβ which had opened in town and she stopped by to check it out. When she arrived, she was surprised to see a high-tech device attached to the exterior wall; there were buttons, a speaker and a monitor which was flashing a neon red message:
βTHIS PROPERTY IS PROTECTED BY AN ELECTRONIC SECURITY SYSTEM. TO SPEAK TO A RECEPTIONIST, PRESS THE BLACK BUTTON BELOW.”
Times have certainly changed!
Chloe pressed the black button and was surprised when the message on the screen disappeared and was replaced by the image of an attractive young woman. Her voice came through the speaker: βWelcome to Beyond the Pale. Iβm Nicole. Please press and hold the green button while speaking. So, how can I help you?β
Chloe pressed the green button. “Yes, hi. I’m Chloe and I’d like to talk to someone about your tanning packages.”
“Sure! I’ll beep you in. You’ll hear a buzz and the door will slide open. Take the elevator to the 2nd floor.”
After the door slid open, Chloe entered the tiny hallway, jumping slightly when the door snapped shut behind her. She took the elevator to the 2nd floor and was greeted by the same woman she saw on the screen.
“Hi, Chloe. Sorry about all the security. It’s the way of the world these days. So, you want to hear about our tanning packages?”
The two women discussed the various packages available and Chloe told Nicole about her upcoming wedding. Chloe chose a package suitable for her and Nicole showed her around the salon. She was surprised to see she was the only customer there. Nicole explained that Mondays were always slow and Chloe had picked a good day to come by; she could have her choice of any of the tanning beds. Chloe looked forward to her first session and was excited to have a deep golden tan for her wedding.
Chloe chose the futuristic Masterson 360 tanning bed; she entered the room and the door closed behind her. She noticed the keypad on the wall was flashing a red “5”; Nicole told Chloe during their tour that meant she had five minutes to undress and apply lotion before getting into the bed. Nicole further explained that Chloe had to say “Start” when she was ready to begin tanning; the lights would turn on and the cover of the bed would automatically lower and lock in position for ten minutes. At the end of her session, the tanning lights would turn off and the cover would open by itself. If Chloe needed to end the session at any time, all she had to do was say “Stop”; the lights would turn off and the lid would disengage and open. Chloe loved the easy, hands-free system; it was unlike any tanning salon she’d been to before.
Meanwhile, back at the reception desk, Nicole answered another call from the front door. Checking the video monitor, she saw it was her boyfriend Dean. She beeped him in and pressed a different button which changed the message on the screen in case any customers showed up. The message read:
βNO ONE IS HERE RIGHT NOW. THE SALON WILL REOPEN IN 15 MINUTES. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE.β
Dean sidled up to the front desk, smarmy as ever. Nicole couldn’t resist the slick and fawning type of guy.
βHey, baby! Youβre looking fine today. You gonna show me how happy you are to see me?β The words practically slithered out of Deanβs mouth.
βI sure am, babe! Iβve been fantasizing all morning about getting it on in the massage room. You ready?β Nicole replied.
Dean grabbed her hand and placed it firmly on his crotch.
“Do I feel ready, Nic?β
Nicole giggled as Dean followed her into the massage room, fondling her ass on the way. Nicole playfully pressed her finger against his lips saying βSshβ as she listened for the sound of Chloeβs tanning bed starting up. Confident that Chloe would be occupied for at least 10 minutes, Nicole pressed a button on the wall keypad which electronically locked every door in the salon.
βThere! Nobody can interrupt us. Now, show me what you got, baby!β
Dean and Nicole started going at it hot and heavy, the heated vibrating massage bed adding to their pleasure. They were really getting down to business when there was a sudden muffled “WOOSH” and the room went black.
βWhoa! What was that?β Dean whispered.
βMust have been a power failure. No worries, babe. Itβs all high-tech stuff but I know how to override the systemβ Nicole answered. She tapped her iPhone flashlight app and padded over to the keyboard panel on the wall. She began pressing one button after the other but nothing happened. Nicole tried repeatedly to bypass the system with no luck.
βShoot! Itβs not responding. Iβm gonna have to call for help; get dressed, Deanβ Nicole commanded. To her dismay, she discovered she had no cell service. Getting dressed as quickly as she could in the darkened room, Nicole told Dean to try his phone. He also had no service. They soon learned the salon phones were not working either.
βOkay, no reason to panic. The salon is connected to a main security facility. Iβm sure theyβre getting our alert right this minute. We just need to sit tight and wait for them to reset the codes. This is a foolproof system. No worries.β
The duo sat on the massage bed waiting for the power to come back on. Nicole elbowed Dean saying βListen! Do you hear that?β
βI donβt hear nothingβ Dean brusquely replied, annoyed that their sexcapade had been cut short.
“Well, I do. It sounds like a tanning bed is running.β
βHow can that be if everythingβs shut down?β Dean asked.
βWell, it shouldnβt be. But listen. Canβt you hear it?β
βYeah. I can hear it now.β
βOh my God!β Nicole cried out. Her hands sprung to her ears trying to block out the sounds. βI can hear her!β
βHear who, Nic? What are you talking about?β
βChloe. Our new client. Dean, she must be stuck in the tanning bed. Oh, God. Why didnβt the bed turn off? We have to help her!β
Dean tried desperately to open the massage room door; it wouldnβt give. There wasnβt even a window in the room they could try to open or break. The air conditioning had shut down and they were both now dripping wet. Nicole was starting to become frantic.
That was nothing compared to how Chloe was feeling.
βοΈ βοΈ βοΈ βοΈ βοΈ
Fifteen minutes earlier Chloe was oiled up and ready for her first tanning session. She slid onto the bed, said βStartβ and chuckled a little imagining herself on an episode of Star Trek. The lights turned on and the cover slowly came down and locked in place. As the warmth enveloped her, Chloe smiled thinking what a great decision she made coming to Beyond the Pale. She relaxed.
Chloe thought about getting a new hairstyle for her big day and how fabulous sheβd look walking down the aisle. And, of course, her mind drifted to her honeymoon in Barbados. She was so content, so happy and certain nothing would get in the way of her perfect wedding day.
The temperature in the tanning bed started getting pretty hot; this was only Chloeβs first session and she didnβt want to get burned. She had lots of sessions to use to build up a nice deep tan. Remembering what Nicole told her about turning off the bed at any time, Chloe said βStopβ. The bed did not turn off. Chloe squinted and tried to locate the speaker system thinking perhaps there was a button she could press. The glaring lights were too much for her eyes; even wearing the eye protectors, Chloe couldnβt locate anything that felt like a speaker. Her vision was obscured and she became more agitated.
The tight quarters of the tanning bed left no room for her to move around but Chloe managed to bend her arms until her hands reached the cover above her. She pushed on the lid to open it but it wouldnβt budge. She tried again, more forcefully this time, but nothing happened; the lid was securely locked in place. βOkay, calm downβ Chloe said to herself. βThe session is probably almost over and the door will pop open any second now. You can do this; itβs just a little heat.β
Chloe started doing her deep breathing exercises, slowly counting off each breath as she went along. She began to relax and was even able to ignore the heat, but then she realized she had counted to 75 and the lights had not turned off. She was definitely in the tanning bed longer than the allotted time and it was getting dreadfully hot. She pushed against the lid once more; no luck.
Chloe panicked.
She began pounding on the tanning bed, screaming for someone to let her out. She was acutely aware of her delicate skin beginning to burn. She was in pain now and could feel her skin sizzling like bacon in a microwave. She began hearing little crackling noises and her face was incredibly hot. Wriggling her arms up to her head, she recoiled in horror when she realized her hair was singed. Oh God! If she didnβt get out of there soon she’d burn up!
Chloe turned into a madwoman as the pain reached new levels; her skin began blistering and oozing. She could smell her body and hair beginning to burn. Her eyes throbbed and felt enormous in their sockets. Chloe screamed like a woman possessed and reached up to cover her face with her hands. Overcome with excruciating pain, Chloe passed out.
π₯ π₯ π₯ π₯ π₯
The emergency alert from Beyond the Pale reached the security facility almost 15 minutes earlier. When their attempts to get through to the salon failed, they called 911. The police and fire department arrived quickly but were faced with tremendous difficulty gaining access to the building. Since the salon was a free standing building with no other businesses nearby, there was no access other than through the salon itself. The door was made of industrial strength metal; the fire fighterβs axes didnβt even leave a dent and because it was a sliding door, there were no hinges to remove. There were only a few windows consisting of thick impact-resistant lucite cubes. The fire chief paced back and forth, trying to figure out how to get inside. As far as he could tell, the salon was in violation of many building safely codes; it was a horror show waiting to happen. In a last-ditch effort, the chief and a small crew climbed up to the roof and began carefully chipping away at the tiles. The last thing they needed was for the roof to cave in.
After what seemed an impossibly long time, a crack appeared in a section of the roof. Painstakingly making the opening larger, the team lowered a ladder into the opening and climbed down. Others followed and found themselves in the salonβs reception area; it was dark and hot and there was a low humming sound coming from one of the rooms down the hall. They also heard faint voices coming from the far back area of the salon.
Tubes of tanning lotion had burst in the heat, emitting a saccharine Tropical aroma, but there was no mistaking the smell coming from the tanning room; it was one first responders never forget β the stench of burning flesh.
One group of fire fighters followed the voices which led them to the massage room. They could barely make out the sounds inside and when they called out, no one responded. The door to the massage room was not a sliding door so the fire crew removed the hinges but it took an additional ten minutes to open the door wide enough for someone to squeeze through. Inside were Nicole and Dean; they were alive but overcome by the intense heat and suffering from dehydration. They were carried out by EMTs and transported to the hospital. A police car followed; once the patients were able to talk, questions needed answering.
Another team followed the smell to the Mastersun360 tanning room; the door was searing hot and a bright glow was visible from under the doorframe. A fire hose was snaked in through the hole in the roof and the tanning room door was sprayed with water in an attempt to cool it down. It sizzled and crackled like fajitas in a Mexican restaurant. It took a long time for the door to cool down but at last the fire fighters were able to remove the pins from the hinges and pry the door open. To their disbelief, the tanning bed was still running; clouds of smoke billowed and sparks danced across the room.
There was no discernable way to turn off the bed. A risky decision was made to cut the thick cables with a giant bolt cutter. Everyone took cover as the fire captain started attacking the cables. They spit and hissed, sparks arcing, but eventually he cut through and the tanning bed ground to a halt. Now that the room was quiet, the feeblest of murmurs could be heard coming from the bed. Grabbing a crowbar, the fire captain went to work on the latch which kept the lid locked in place. With a loud SNAP the latch detached. It took four people to lift the lid.
What they saw made even the most seasoned veterans among them cringe; a few became physically sick. Lying on the tanning bed was what remained of Chloe; her body was seared and oozing, taking on the heinous appearance of a massive slug. With excruciatingly slow movements, Chloe managed to tilt her head a fraction of an inch in the direction of the fire fighters, made a low gurgling noise and died.
A specialized detail was called in to remove Chloe’s molten body. The salon was cordoned off and an investigation would begin immediately.
Poor Chloe. All she wanted was a golden tan for her special day. She wanted to be a beautiful bride, something all women hoped for. Was that too much to ask? How could Chloe know her simple wish was unattainable, something beyond the pale?
βTHIS PROPERTY IS PROTECTED BY AN ELECTRONIC SECURITY SYSTEM. TO SPEAK TO A RECEPTIONIST, PRESS THE BLACK BUTTON BELOW.”Times had certainly changed!
βNO ONE IS HERE RIGHT NOWTHE SALON WILL REOPEN IN 15 MINUTES. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE.βDean sidled up to the front desk, smarmy as ever. Nicole was always attracted to the slick and fawning type of guy.βHey, babyoDeanβs mouth.
βHey, Charlie! Phil! Get a load of these jackasses!β neighed Daryl as he stared over the fence onto the country road. βDo they really think theyβre capable of winning a race? On two legs?? This takes the cake!”
βDaryl, Iβm pretty sure theyβre not actual jackassesβ whinnied Charlie. βThey just look like jackasses!β
Phil kicked up his back legs and snickered loudly. Tossing back his glossy black hair, he gave out a hearty laugh. βThat was hysterical, Charlie! βThey just look like jackasses!β Absolutely priceless!β
βWell, they’re sure acting like jackasses! What the heck are they doing?β asked Daryl.
βTheyβre jogging – people run around all bandy-legged with arms flailing getting all sweaty going nowhere in particular and looking pretty dumb while doing it.β Charlie explained.
Phil trotted over. βYeah. I read about these idiots in Horse Beautiful. Itβs some kind of craze, far as I can tell .. some sort of asinine exercise routine.β
βYeahβ agreed Charlie. βWhat a total waste of time! And thereβs even more of them running around the city.β
βOMG!β laughed Daryl loudly. βCheck out these two in their matching his-and-hers outfits. Look at the shape they’re in!They gotta weigh 600 pounds combined. Can you imagine them riding us? Oh, my aching back! My screaming knees!β
βWhoa, whoa, whoa! Look at what we got here, boys. Now thatβs some fine-looking little filly!β exclaimed Phil as he moseyed nearer to the fence. “Oh yeah. I’d like to see her in a wet t-shirt contest!’
βShe sure is something else, alrightβ Charlie agreed. βCheck out those tiny shorts she’s wearing. She can ride me bareback any time she wants!β
βMan, now that’s one stacked number! I could watch her jog and bounce around all day!β Daryl smacked his lips.
βHey! What are you three flea bags doing all this way from the barn? Farmer Brownβs gonna have a cow if he hears you jumped the fence again!β It was Barkley, the yellow lab who lived on the ranch. βBest get yourselves back home before someone notices youβre gone. C’mon! Giddy-up!β
βRace ya!β snorted Phil and the trio took off leaving Barkley in their dust.β
βBunch of jackasses!β Barkley yowled indignantly. “Well, good riddance to them and woof to you, sexy lady. You jog by here often? Have I got a bone for you!”
This weekend our challenge is to write a poem or story in exactly 95 words incorporating the word βoperaβ. Please see the challenge link below the video.
About 20 years ago I discovered my son David could sing. He had been out at a karaoke bar and I heard he βblew the roof off the placeβ singing an Iron Maiden song.
Well, that was enough for me. When I heard him sing I was stunned. I convinced him to join me in our church choir. He soon became lead tenor and joined several opera companies.
Since COVID, David has not performed. You can be sure once heβs back on stage his dad and I will be right there in the front row.
NB β David is The Wandering Minstrel. This is the entire operetta starting at David’s entrance point. Please do not feel compelled to watch the entire show; however, if you do, I hope you enjoy the renaissance version of Il Mikado!
My life-long friend sat beside me, holding my hand as I lay crumbled in bed. Her eyes were rheumy from too many tears, very uncharacteristic of her; I was used to her carefree, bawdy laugh β just one of the many things we had in common.
βIs there anyone youβd like to talk to β¦ besides me, that is?β she asked, already aware of what my answer would be.
βIf you mean a priest, you know better than thatβ I whispered in reply. βNo. I’m ready to go. And youβll be on my heels, toots!β My friend cackled; she knew I spoke the truth but it did not frighten her. Like me, she had enough of this mortal coil.
Weβd been through a lot together, she and I. We thought of each other as sisters, not just best friends. There was only one secret I never shared with her or anyone and I would take that to my grave. I knew I wouldnβt have to wait much longer.
We had both lost our husbands a couple of years earlier; hers went first and mine followed shortly after. We were there for each other through it all. Part of me was relieved my husband went before me; he had always been the stalwart in our marriage, a steady rock who cared for our family without complaint. He was stronger than me; I always knew that and at times it made me feel ashamed because I doubted I could do for him what he did for me. He cared for me even when he was exhausted and ready to drop. How he cried seeing me in pain; he thought I didn’t know but I could hear him weeping late at night. He loved me with all his being until his last day; he slipped away in his sleep without a chance to say goodbye β perhaps the kindest way for both of us. It would have killed him if I’d gone first, leaving him alone.
βIβm so pissed offβ I said, making my friend laugh again.
βTell me about it!βΒ she replied colloquially.Β βI feel your pain, sis.βΒ And I knew she truly did.
Damn this arthritis, this crippling disease that turned me into a twisted dried up old vine! βRemember when I was a hot number a thousand years ago? My melons were nice and firm back then!β
βHaha!! They called us ‘The Honey-Do Twins!βΒ and we both laughed again, happy memories of our once supple bodies dancing around in our brains.Β
βWhat the fuck happened?βΒ and again we cracked up. Our laughs turned to coughs and gradually we calmed ourselves. I strained my eyes to look at my dear friend; at this point, my mouth and my eyes were my only body parts that moved on their own without pain.
βIβve got one regretβΒ I whispered.Β βI should have fought harder. I let this damn crippler control me. I should have pushed myself, done more with my family and friends. I pray they understand and forgive me. I wanted to spend more time with them, live a fuller life; I just hurt too damn much.β
Tears ran down my face and my friend wiped them away. βDo you want me to call your sons?β she asked.
βNo, not now. Wait till itβs over. I canβt bear to look at them.β Even now Iβm thinking of myself. What a coward! βKiss me goodbye, sis. Iβll see you on the other side. I love you very much, you know.β
My friend leaned over from her wheelchair; she gently pushed my hair aside and kissed my cheek, our salty tears mingling.
βGoodbye, my dearest friend. I love youβΒ she murmured, even though she knew I could no longer hear her.Β βIβll be right behind you.β
Just like the bighorn sheep of North America who shed their wool in the summer, Iβm about to do a bit of shedding of my own. Iβll be lightening the load, taking out the garbage, so to speak.
Does anyone else think thereβs a whole lot of crapola on TV these days? Seriously β what do people watch all damn day long? I have to be sick as a dog in bed to even think of putting the TV on during the day.
I know some people love to watch their game shows and others are hooked on the news. Thatβs fine. They can have it! I canβt take more than 30 seconds of that Mike Lindell guy screaming about his freaking awesome pillows or the endless stream of bobble heads on 24/7 news yelling at each other nonstop. Theyβre literally sitting two feet away from each other; why all the yelling?
And thatβs just daytime TV; prime time is even worse, especially if you have to put up with commercials. Why is it everyone on TV ads has βmoderate to severe plaque psoriasisβ or βsuffers from the embarrassment of IBSβ?
By now youβve probably figured out I donβt watch much TV; Iβd rather write stories, listen to music or work on my plants than sit in front of the TV while my brain cells shrivel up and die.
Now Iβm not talking about ball games or movies; they are the exception to the rule. I enjoy kicking back to a good move and will watch just about any baseball game that happens to be on but in my opinion everything else is garbagio.
I know nothing about Game of Thrones, The Good Doctor or La Brea. And what the hell is the point of Naked and Afraid? Why do the people have to be naked AND afraid? Canβt they just be afraid? I know I am!
Iβve never seen one minute of any reality show such as The Karadashians (gag me with a spoon!) or The Bachelorette (kill me now!). I watched about ten minutes of Jeopardy! with the new host whose name I canβt pronounce β¦ you know, the one who loves to tell anyone who will listen that she has a doctorate in neuroscience. Who gives a ratβs ass? Iβd rather watch Naked and Afraid.
Let me give you a rundown of the shows I watch:
Days of Our Lives (which Bill and I record and watch in the evening)
General Hospital (which Bill and I record and watch in the evening)
Americaβs Got Talent (I like talent shows despite the over-the-top Terry Crews)
Grantchester (a fantastic BBC show)
All Creatures Great and Small (another fantastic BBC show)
Outlander (yet another fantastic show from the UK with lots of men in kilts as a bonus)
NB β Quality shows like 4-6 usually take two years or more between seasons; why it takes that long to film 10 episodes is beyond me but we patiently wait for their return because they are bloody amazing shows. They’re also commercial free; gotta hand it to the Brits!
Thatβs all folks! Pretty short list, I know.
So, what did I mean about taking out the garbage? After way too many years of watching the mind-numbing Days of Our Lives and General Hospital, I have cut the “soap on a rope”. Why? Because they are stupid, insipid, a huge waste of time and an insult to my intelligence. My 13-year-old granddaughter could write better storylines. And you know what else? I wonβt even miss them.
GOOD RIDDANCE!
One thingβs for sure: in the world of soaps very little changes. If I decide to tune in to either of those soaps five or six years from now, Lulu will still be in a coma and somebody in Salem will be possessed β¦ again. Oy! Now thatβs just stupid!
We all grow up. We age. It’s inevitable, a fact of life.
Over the past few months I’ve watched all my grandchildren blossom into bigger versions of their mini-selves. They are a beautiful batch, every single one of them.
But this kid, my second oldest grandchild. Lucan, age 11 going on 21. Ah, how I remember those early days with his Norman Rockwell all-American look. A little fuzzy towhead with bright blue eyes and a cute-as-can-be babyface.
Now his eyes are beguiling with crazy long eyelashes. His face is chiseled, full lips. And that pin-straight blonde hair with his own unique style. This kid’s a real looker, a charmer.
I just have one question: when did my grandson turn into Jonathan Rhys Meyers? π
For this weekβs Stream of Consciousness Saturday, we were asked to βfind a word that starts with the letter βuβ and use it however youβd like.β Someone wrote a piece about the βukuleleβ which got me thinking. Hereβs my stream of consciousness:
How many people do you know who play the ukulele? Unless youβre from the glorious state of Hawaii, I bet your answer is the same as mine: None.
Oh, Iβve heard people playing the ukulele. If youβre old enough youβll remember Arthur Godfreyβs ukulele playing and his signature greeting of βHow Ah Ya? How Ah Ya? How Ah Ya?β. And letβs not forget Don Hoβs βTiny Bubblesβ. Hell, even George Harrison mastered the ukulele; he played the instrument for at least 20 Beatles songs; bet you didnβt know that. I have no idea how many ukes George owned but you can be sure it was a lot; he didnβt just like the instrument β he was obsessed with it.
Still, I never gave the ukulele much thought. I had nothing against it; I just never thought about it until one day I heard something so wondrous, so ineffably sweet and touching, I sat mesmerized by the magic coming from the radio. It was only after the song was over that I realized I was crying.
Give a listen, wonβt you? Donβt worry if you cry; itβll be our secret.
NB β Israel Kamakawiwoβole suffered from obesity throughout his life, at one point weight 757 pounds while standing 6β2β tall. He endured several hospitalizations because of his weight. With chronic medical problems including respiratory and cardiac issues, he died at the age of 38 in the Queenβs Medical Center on June 26, 1997, from respiratory failure.
PS – I read recently that some readers outside the US, especially in the UK, cannot view the videos I post. That’s a shame because they are relative to the story and make for some damn good viewing. If you are unable to watch these videos, please drop me a line in the comments section. I think there’s a way around it; how easy it is I have no idea but I want you all to get the full benefit of my stories. Thank you!
Story challenge by my friends at NopeNotPam β Letter of the day: S
SALVATION!! Can you say it along with me, brothers and sisters?
SALVATION AND SATISFACTION!!
Since venturing out on our long-anticipated vacation, I have discovered so much more than the sultry sun, the salty sea, the scrumptious seafood and the sinfully sleek and sensual satin sheets.
I have found salvation from stress, suffering, stiffness, strain, stenosis, sciatica and sleeplessness. And contrary to what our dear Sir Mick sings while strutting sexily on stage in all his sartorial splendor,Β βIΒ CANΒ GET SOME SATISFACTION!β
βHow?β you inquire suspiciously? Well, at the risk of sounding like a super-store salesperson, itβs all due to the soothing stress-relieving qualities of the Sidney Slider Power Recliner.
Seriously. I shit you not.
Since we arrived at our secluded, solitary and secret get-away location, I made a startling discovery: I am living a pain-free life for the first time in several years! Yes, Iβm de-stressed simply being on sabbatical but I know without a scintilla of doubt my pains have subsided significantly because of this sensational sprawling supersonic seat at our seaside suite. Keep your sardonic comments to yourself; as a self-proclaimed scholar of recliners and a reclining specialist, I know what Iβm talking about and speak nothing but the truth, so help me Stickley Furniture World.
How can something so simple as this recliner make me feel like a new woman, a renewed and improved supple design of the feminine species? I have no idea! Someone seriously smarter than me designed a lounger with superb supine capabilities. All I know is something shocking happened, something so spectacular that I am singing its praises while simultaneously shedding tears of shear joy. I am in seventh heaven β so much so that I have placed an order for my very ownΒ Sidney Slider Power ReclinerΒ (since I cannot bring this one back with me). Sadly, itβs not in stock at the moment BUT in less than two very short weeks it will be on its way to my home. Stupendous!
This is no small thing and I mean that literally.Β SidneyΒ (weβre already on a first name basis)Β is a big boy, significantly larger than what Iβm accustomed to.Β Β I shall have to find a way to make him fit but make no mistake β this scintillatingly smooth suede stunner will fit! The only question I struggled with was which color I should select β the sensual sable or the shimmering sand?
Iβll have to wait just a scant few days after my return but it will all be worth it. If you could only see the sheepish smile of satisfaction on my face.
For the first time in more than five years, Lydia was beginning to see some light at the end of the tunnel. After struggling through a failed business venture and the misery of a toxic marriage, she was back on her feet and ready to start over. But first a little R&R was in order.
Lydiaβs longtime friend and former business colleague offered her the use of her vacation house in Punta Cana. Having never been to the Dominican Republic, she jumped at the opportunity to get away to a place where she was anonymous; it would be the refuge she needed to relax and reflect on getting her life back.
The house was tiny and secluded β perfect for Lydia. Her plan was to shut out the world and do nothing but eat, sleep and swim in the large pool which took up most of the back yard. With the exception of a tall locked wrought iron gate in the front of the house, the property was totally surrounded by a high, impassable bamboo fence. Lydia felt very safe alone in the house.
After breakfast on her first day, Lydia grabbed a towel, a book and a bottle of water and headed out to the pool. The day was glorious with brilliant sunshine and she sat under a thatched umbrella reading her book. The sound of the water swirling around the pool was too inviting and Lydia could resist no longer. Spying a nearby float, she waded into the pool and gingerly climbed on.
βAhβ Lydia sighed. βIβm never getting off this thing.β
The only sounds were the gentle splashing of the poolβs mini waterfall and an occasional bird calling out to its mate in the dense gardens beyond the house. It was idyllic and Lydia silently blessed her friend for the use of her home.
After about 20 minutes of bliss, Lydia’s reverie was interrupted by the barking of a dog; however, it sounded far enough away for her not to be terribly put off. The barking stopped for a while and Lydia relaxed but it started up again. This time the dog was closer and a little more persistent. βGreatβ Lydia murmured under her breath. βJust what I need. Maybe heβll go away and stay away.β
But the dog did not go away and Lydia quickly became impatient and annoyed by the intrusion. βExcuse meβ she called out to no one in particular. βCan you please bring your dog inside?β
No response and the dog kept barking. It got closer and louder and Lydia became increasingly pissed off. βHola! Please take the dog inside!β she yelled, a little more forcefully.
Again, no response. By now the dog was barking and growling with a vengeance. Lydia was fed up and she lost her cool.
βHey!! Shut your dog the fuck up!β she shouted in the direction of the barking. Soon after Lydia heard a man yelling in the distance: βPerro! Ven aquΓ!β
The dog barked once in response, his yelps becoming more and more distant. At last, peace had been restored.
Lydia must have dozed off on the float. Rubbing her tired eyes, she became aware of deep-throated growling sounds on the other side of the fence. The dog was back but this time he wasnβt barking. It was impossible to tell through the thick bamboo but it sounded like he had a bone or a chew toy and was gnawing away. Well, at least he wasnβt barking; she could live with the gnawing.
Lydia was lost in her thoughts for the future, the dog next door forgotten, when she was startled by aggressive scratching and burrowing noises near the fence. She glanced over and noticed the bamboo was shaking. She looked down and froze. Her blood ran cold and the little hairs on her arms stood straight up.
Panic set in as she saw the dogβs nose break through the bottom of the fence. Suddenly a huge, drooling mouth with razor-sharp fangs became visible. In the next second the lupine-like dog crashed through the bamboo barrier, heading straight for the pool.
Lydia let out a blood-curdling scream and flailed frantically in the water but she couldnβt get out of the pool fast enough. She was no match for the hungry wolf dog. The image of huge teeth and piercing yellow eyes inches from her face was the last thing she saw.
Listen to the waves as they kiss the shore, the rustle of the beachgrass in the gentle breeze. The golden hues of sunrise pirouette gracefully on the terrace and across the bed. The start of another day, as blissful and serene as the one before it. Summertime.
Is that my heart beating deeply or yours? Both, you say. You caress my shoulders. Hold me in your arms as if itβs our first time, our last time. I feel free. I feel ageless. I feel more cherished than any other woman.
You are my one, my soul, my heart. I watch your profile as you gaze out the window, peaceful and content. My fingers curl through the hair on your chest, now grey. That does not matter. Only we matter.
How long have we been alone together? A thousand summertimes, you say. How long will we be alone together? For a thousand more, I reply.
You pull me closer, eyes dancing in the morning light. Let the world go on without us. We are here where we belong β alone together.
In January, 2021 I wrote a story with an unresolved ending called “On the Way”. It was one of several which I recorded and submitted to the BBC Radio show called Upload. When my story was broadcast on the air, the program host William Wright commented that he hoped some day I would write a follow-up. That comment stayed with me and fourteen months later I decided to do just that. That story was called “When the Fog Rolls In.” Recently I thought it would be interesting to combine the two stories by creating a new beginning and ending and tweaking sections within the body of the stories. Since then, I had the opportunity to enter a fiction writing contest; the call was for a 1,000 – 3,000 word mystery story. I decided to submit my reconstructed story. The word counter on my Microsoft Office page said the story was 2,654 words β not too shabby. I don’t enter many contests but every time I do I’m shocked by the number of writers who also submit stories. My stuff better be damn good if it stands a chance of winning against 400+ entries. Well, my story did not win but that’s okay; I tried my best and had fun creating this compilation. I am not deterred. The winning story was a masterpiece and deserved to come in 1st place so kudos to the author. Here is my story; I hope you enjoy ‘Screaming in the Night’.
βI can see it now! I can see it! Got to get it!!β
David Stapleton screamed in his sleep. He flailed about on his bed, entangled in a mass of sweaty sheets and blankets. David slowly started to come out of his stupor, stuck in a surreal and frightening dimension between sleep and wakefulness. His eyelids felt stuck together and his mouth was parched. His body was stiff and leaden, his breathing heavy, his heart beating rapidly. David wasnβt sure of his surroundings; was this real or was he reliving his worst nightmare?
Gradually David became more aware. Yes, it was as he feared β the uncontrollable, unstoppable dream, his nightly companion. He sat up in bed and reached for a cigarette. Flipping open his old, beat up lighter, he lit a Marlboro and inhaled deeply. He sat in silence, smoking and thinking, his thoughts spinning like a Vegas roulette wheel. Each night he crawled into bed exhausted, desperately in need of sleep yet terrified that the dream would come again.
David glanced at his alarm clock; 4:17 AM β ridiculously early but he knew he would not be falling back to sleep. He slipped on his sweatpants and shuffled into the kitchen to make coffee. While the coffee brewed, David stared into the oh so familiar fog. He lit another cigarette and thought about that night four years ago.
Four Years Earlier:
David drove home that dark and foggy night barely able to see the road ahead of him. An electrical storm that evening wreaked havoc with the streetlights on Route 718 causing them to flash at indiscriminate intervals. Even though his was the only car on the dimly lit road, the strobe effect from the lights was haphazard and dangerously distracting. There were shadows looming everywhere; David never saw the cyclist cross his path.
The impact was powerful yet made only a quiet thud like the subtle reload of a gunβs magazine. The visual impression, however, was appalling. The tableau switched to slow motion; David watched in horror as a mangled body performed a βdanse macabreβ across the hood of his car while musical passages from βO Fortunaβ screamed in his head. The cyclist soared through the air like an acrobat and landed in a twisted heap 20 feet or so away.
David sat motionless in his car; no other living creature was anywhere in sight. βWhat to do? What to do?β raced through his mind. Heβd never had a car accident, not even a parking ticket. Now he had run someone down β an innocent cyclist. Was it a man or a woman? Surely this person would be missed by family and friends, perhaps his or her parents or β God forbid β their children. What a terrible fate, a horrible accident. Yes, David had a few drinks after work, just a few; the alcohol had to be out of his system by now. But wait; the cyclist wore no reflective clothing, not even a warning light on the bikeβs handlebars or wheels. Out cycling in the night, alone; wasnβt that tempting fate? Maybe they got what they deserved.
Slowly David opened the door and looked around; the deafening silence was pounding in his brain, the absence of people other-worldly. With measured steps he approached the crumpled body. A gentle push of his booted foot confirmed what he already suspected: the cyclist was dead. A battered helmet sat near the edge of the road; the bright orange and black βKTMβ emblem of the bicycle manufacturer in Austria stared at David accusingly. The longer he looked at the emblem the more he realized he had two choices: he could report the accident to the police and face the consequences or he could clean up this mess and get on with his life.
As he walked back to his car David knew what he had to do. A look at the front end showed very little damage, a small inconvenience he could deal with later. More pressing matters prevailed; first he had to extricate the bicycle from under his car. David sat in the driverβs seat, shifted the car into reverse and gently backed up. After a couple of seconds he could feel the car and the bicycle disengage.
The bike was a wreck but there wasnβt much debris on the road. Retrieving his leather jacket, David wrapped it around the top tube bar of the bike and carried it back to the dead cyclist. Taking a few steps away from the road he realized it would be easy to throw the bike over the edge, making it look like the cyclist had swerved off the road β if the body was ever found at all. He gave the bike a hefty toss and it disappeared into the woods below. With his foot David then rolled the cyclistβs body and helmet down the hill.
David walked back to his car and broke off a low hanging branch from a tree which he used to sweep the road clear of any pieces of glass or metal. Getting back into the car, he turned on the radio and cranked up the volume; his adrenaline was pumping.
βOkβ David murmured to himself. βItβs all gonna be ok. Just one last thing. Got to take care of that little dent in the hood of my car.β David kept driving until he reached a busy gas station. As he drove up to a pump, he intentionally smashed into a metal barrier; witnesses could attest to the fender bender.
Davidβs decision to flee the scene was fueled by fear and self-preservation. Now as he drove home he felt much more relaxed and confident. He reached for his jacket but it wasnβt there. His face went pale and he broke out in a cold sweat. Closing his eyes he could clearly see his jacket wrapped around the bicycle, his phone still in the pocket, as it made its final descent into the woods.
Four Years Later:
Tom Delaney sat alone at his favorite bar sipping his third bourbon. Life had quickly gone down the shitter a few months ago when he bet big time on a βsure thingβ that didnβt pan out. That was one of Tomβs biggest faults; he was always looking for the quick fix, the money angle, whether legit or not. Now here he was, a 38-year-old washed up ex PI with a huge chip on his shoulder, a failed marriage and no money.
When the bartender announced closing time, Tom begrudgingly slid off his stool and made his way to his car. He took Route 718 toward his parentβs cabin which they left to him in their will. With no other known relatives, Tom was totally alone trying to get his life back on track. So far he wasn’t having much luck.
The weather was changing and when the fog rolls in, driving on 718 gets hairy.
He wasnβt on the road very long when he found himself in pea soup conditions. Suddenly a deer appeared out of nowhere and Tom swerved, coming to a screeching stop. After a brief standoff, the deer gracefully bounded down the steep edge and disappeared into the thick woods.
Shaken, Tom settled himself in his car. The glow of the headlights picked up the reflection a shiny object in the thicket below. Being a curious type, Tom drove his car closer to the edge and grabbed a flashlight from the backseat. Gingerly he made his way down the side of the bluff landing on a heavily overgrown outcropping about 15 feet below. He walked around for a few minutes before his foot came in contact with an unknown object; whatever it was rolled a couple of feet away. Tom walked over and crouched down for a better look; the item turned out to be a battered helmet with the weather-beaten orange and black βKTMβ emblem of a bicycle manufacturer.
Disappointed that his find wasnβt something valuable, Tom stood up to leave. He took a few steps and heard a strange βcrunchβ under his Doc Martens. Shining his flashlight on his boot, Tom couldnβt believe what was buried under the leaves and debris.
βHoly shit! A human skeleton!” Tom immediately remembered the helmet. “Poor guy must have ridden his bicycle off the road. Wonder where the bike is?” Tom panned the area with his flashlight. He was about to give up when something caught his eye. “Well, well, what have we here?β Tom moved some leaves out of the way and discovered a fanny pack which he took, clipping it onto a loop on his jeans. Maybe heβd get lucky and find some money in the bag.
Deciding to investigate a little more, Tom eventually came across the bicycle caught up in a large bush. It was a mangled mess, certainly of no value to him; nearby was a moldy leather jacket. Tom snagged the jacket and went through the pockets; nothing. Noticing a zippered inner compartment, he found an iPhone inside. Slipping the phone into his rear pocket, Tom slowly pulled himself up the cliff to his car and drove off. He left the scene with that uneasy, suspicious feeling heβd get while working on a case. Old habits die hard.
Once home, Tom reached into his rear pocket and retrieved the phone he found in the leather jacket. He emptied the contents of the fanny pack onto the kitchen counter: assorted crap, a wallet and an iPhone. βHmm. Two phones. Why would one person need two iPhones? Maybe two people were there that night. What the hell happened? Was this the scene of an accident or a crime?β Tomβs PI sixth sense was working overtime now.
Both phones were wet. Drying them off, Tom placed the phones and SIM cards into two separate Ziploc bags filled with silica gel packets he had stockpiled. Theyβd have to dry out a day or two. Next he went through the wallet: $47 which he immediately pocketed, an expired debit card and a driverβs license. The license was issued to Joseph Barnes, 312 Ogden Terrace, Sparta, NJ. β a 90-minute drive from Tom’s cabin.
Tom broke out his own iPhone and Googled βJoseph Barnes, Sparta, NJβ; it took a little while as he scrolled down then BINGO! There it was β a missing person flyer dated January 2018. Last known location was Bethlehem, PA β a few miles from the cabin. There was a phone number to call. A picture of Joseph Barnes on a bike holding a KTM helmet smiled at Tom; the same face was on the driverβs license.
While the phones dried out, Tom spent most of the following day at Wind Creek Casino in Bethlehem playing the penny slots with Joseph Barnesβ $47. He was on a roll and left the casino with $100 in his pocket. Tom couldnβt wait any longer and anxiously drove home to see if he could get the iPhones up and running.
He took the phones out of the bags, inserted the SIM cards and turned them on; both phones started up. To Tomβs amazement, neither phone needed a passcode. Checking ‘Settings’ on both phones, he found what he suspected all along: one phone belonged to Joseph Barnes and the other belonged to someone named David Stapleton from Allentown, PA.
βDavid, David, David. Why were you on Route 718 that night and what did you do to Joseph Barnes?β he thought. Tom realized that after four years David Stapleton could be anywhere with a different identity, job and phone number but there was only one way to find out. After his win at the casino, he was feeling lucky. This could be the big break he was waiting for.
Slipping the two phones into his pockets, Tom drove to his favorite bar. On the corner was an old phone booth with a pay telephone β the untraceable kind. Tom opened Davidβs iPhone; there were two different phone numbers for him. Tom hesitated for a minute thinking about his days as a PI.
Instinct took over, suggesting he ignore the first number on Davidβs phone and go for the second one. Tom reasoned that the first number was likely Davidβs cell number; there was a chance the second number was for a business or a house for David β anything that might provide a clue. It was worth a shot. After all, Tom wasnβt looking to talk to David just yet; all he wanted was a lead.
Tom dropped two quarters into the public phone slot and dialed the second number on Davidβs cell. The call was answered on the third ring. βHi. This is David at Stapleton Plumbing and Heating in Allentown. Weβre closed now but will reopen at 8 AM. Please call back then.β
Pay dirt! Tom Delaney may be down but he wasnβt out! Heβd head back to the cabin and Google Stapleton Plumbing and Heating for an address. But first a little celebration β some pleasant company at the bar with his old friend Jim Beam.
Sipping his drink, Tom could practically smell the shakedown money heβd be raking in. As he drove home from the bar, the ubiquitous late-night fog rolled in. Tom was momentarily blinded by a pair of oncoming headlights and swerved right to avoid a collision. He turned the steering wheel sharply and his car plowed through bushes, bounced off trees, rolled over itself down the steep hill and crash-landed upside down in a ravine at the bottom of the cliff before it burst into flames.
Poor Tom. Just when things were starting to look up. Karmaβs a bitch.
A few hours later David Stapleton once again found himself in the clutches of his bedtime companion β the ever-present nightmare. He woke up drenched in sweat and bolted straight out of bed, his heart racing. He felt nauseous and dizzy. Staggering into the bathroom, he grasped the edge of the sink staring at his sweat-soaked face in the mirror.
βHow could you have been so callous leaving that cyclist? How have you been living with yourself the past four years?β This wasn’t living, he realized, knowing every day would end with the same hellish nightmare.
David stood in the bathroom and closed his eyes; he could clearly see his leather jacket wrapped around the bicycle he threw over the cliff four years ago, his phone still in the pocket, as it made its final descent into the woods β the same dream that left him screaming in the night, every night, for the past four years. βI can see it now!β he sobbed. βI can see it.β
Overcome with fear, exhaustion and remorse, David walked out the back door of his apartment above the plumbing business. Barefoot and shirtless, he was unfazed by the cold and dense fog rolling in. Blindly he went down the damp rickety steps and walked deeper in the woods behind his apartment β unseeing, uncaring.
Suddenly David felt a searing pain in his chest. Gasping for air, he clutched his arm and fell to his knees, rolling down the wet, moss-covered precipice in the woods. Ten seconds later, David Stapleton was sprawled out in the shrouded morass 30 feet below, dead from a massive heart attack.
Was it a heart attack that killed David Stapleton or overwhelming guilt? No one will ever know for sure. David never knew that with Tomβs death he was completely in the clear of any crime; the only evidence β the phone that tied him to that horrible accident β was now in the jacket pocket of Tom Delaneyβs incinerated body.
Tom and David β both dead on the same night a few miles apart β one hunting and the other haunted.
The poem below is the second one I wrote for the book “Wounds I Healed: The Poetry of Strong Women”. There were many submissions for the book, which became a #1 bestseller on Amazon in just one day; I consider myself very fortunate to have been among those selected to appear in this important and timely anthology of the challenges and adversities women face and how they overcome them. I hope you enjoy my poem “The Shells”.
Shells scattered along the shore
Some glittering in the golden sunlight
Lapis lazuli kisses of blue and green upon the water
This story was recently published onΒ The Writers Club.Β I would like to thank them for showcasing my work which was originally published on WordPress on September 17, 2017. Thank you!
Hard to imagine life without her. When the hell did everything start to unravel?
Now he sat alone in the shell of their apartment, baseball game on the tv playing for no one, nursing his second Dewars. Once upon a time this place was alive with people enjoying one of their famous dinner parties. When he closed his eyes he could hear their friends discussing politics, movies, the crazy tenants on the 2nd floor β¦ and the sound of her spirited laugh when someone told a dirty joke.
They were the perfect couple, the envy of all their friends. Theirs was an easy, comfortable marriage β viewing a gallery in SoHo, cycling through Central Park, steamy showers after Saturday morning love-making. They were in sync in their choices of restaurants, paint colors and the biggest decision of all β¦ neither one wanted kids.
He sat there, head in hands while a thousand thoughts went through his mind. When did he begin having second thoughts? Was it the weekend in Maine spent visiting his sister after the birth of her first baby? Was it watching the kids in the playground across the street? All he could remember was the night he whispered in her ear that he wanted to have a baby.
She was blindsided. What? No! He was just named partner at Goldman Sachs. She was food editor for Connoisseur magazine. Life is perfect. They had an agreement, dammit! Would she just consider thinking about it? No! How could he spring this on her now?
Weeks, months went by. She remained adamant, distant. Then one day he came home after work and she was gone.
Here he sat, alone with his Dewars, ballgame long over, fingering his wedding band, staring at divorce papers.
It couldnβt have happened to a more perfect couple.
After four long years of difficult times, including two heartbreaking family deaths, a couple of surgeries, a multitude of hellacious aches and pains, the loss of a few family pets and β oh yeah β a pandemic, we are finally going on vacation!
V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N in the Summertime!
I know, cry me a river, right! This has not been a happy time for any of us; however, you know that saying βI feel your pain!β? Well, we sorta do but your pain is your pain and my pain is my pain so letβs not get all prickly about this.
Oh, it hasnβt been all bad: during that time we welcomed a new granddaughter. I have no right to brag; after all, I didnβt make her β God did β and what a work of art she is. She can truly take the worst day and turn it into Christmas!
So, in the blink of an eye my mister and I will be heading out of town to relax, recoup, refresh and recharge. Oh, itβs nothing extravagant; just a little time by the sea (which sea, I am not saying!)
But being a creature of habit, I shall pop in from time to time; I need to see whatβs going on, to check in with YOU and to write, of course.
Hasta la vista, baby! You wonβt even know Iβm gone!