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SPEAKING WORDS OF WISDOM

Nancy's Notes πŸ–ŠοΈβ™¬

If there’s such a thing as a β€œreligious mutt”, that would be me:

β€’ Born and raised Presbyterian (totally laid back)

β€’ Attended Lutheran school for 12 years (spiritually ardent)

β€’ Married a great Catholic guy and converted to Catholicism (not a huge leap from Lutheran but a billion light years from Presbyterian)

I now think of myself as a Christian; it’s a long story for another time.

Though diverse in many ways, one basic tenet these three denominations espouse is the existence of heaven and hell. 

As a teenager at our quaint Presbyterian church, I taught Sunday School to kindergarteners. We read Bible stories, watched animated videos about the Old and New Testaments, sang songs, did religious arts and crafts. It was uncomplicated – until one of the children asked what happens when we die. 

β€œYou go to heaven, unless you’ve been really bad” one girl adamantly answered.

“Yeah! Then you go to H-E-L-L!” another kid chimed in, spelling out the bad word. 

β€œThat’s right but only the girls get turned into angels and then God tries to do the best he can with the boys” claimed an intrepid little girl.

β€œThat’s not true” yelled the boys. ”Everybody in heaven is an angel and God is the head angel!” 

Suppressing a laugh, I figured I better take back control of my class and start asking some questions.

β€œWho thinks they know what heaven is like?” I asked.

The girls all agreed that β€œthere’s lots of singing and dancing to harp music and everyone wears flowers in their hair.” 

But the boys had different opinions, especially about wearing flowers in their hair. β€œBoys have halos just like Jesus and they help feed the animals in heaven.” 

One boy raised his hand and answered very seriously β€œThere are no doctors or lawyers in heaven because God does all the healing and arguments aren’t allowed.”

β€œThere’s always angel food cake – not devil’s food cake” giggled a blue-eyed tyke. 

A little girl was next to answer the question. β€œGod sits in heaven but he isn’t on a throne or anything like that. He sits in a garden playing with the children, puppies and kittens and lets them climb on him. And the grownups just do stuff like they used to do at home.” 

I asked another question: β€œHow did heaven begin?” 

Silence. 

Then one timid, diminutive girl answered quietly β€œA really long time ago a lot of kids were crying because their grandmas and grandpas were dying so God said β€˜Don’t cry. I’m going to make a beautiful place way above the clouds where all the grandparents and parents and pets can stay forever’. And so he made heaven.” 

I felt a lump in my throat, perhaps thinking of my own grandparents, but in all honesty I’m sure it was the simple yet poignant answer of that sweet girl. I coughed a bit to mask the emotion in my voice and asked another question. 

β€œIs there a special test to get into heaven?” 

I was rewarded with a resounding β€œNO!”

I countered with β€œNo? Well if there’s no test how do we get into heaven?” 

An adorable red haired boy covered with freckles quickly raised his hand and said β€œWhen you get to heaven God whispers one question in your ear.” 

β€œHe does? What’s the question?” I asked. 

Β β€œHe asks β€˜Do you love me?’ It’s really not a hard question. And when you say β€˜Yes’, God kisses you and says β€˜Come on in!”Β 

Intrigued by that answer I asked β€œAnd how do you know this?” 

Displaying a toothless grin he declaredΒ β€œMy grandpa tells me every time I talk to him. That’s what God asked my grandpa when he got to heaven and he said β€˜YES!’” 

And all the kids shouted β€œYES!!” 

I think I’m ready for my final exam. Are you?

NAR Β© 2023

28 thoughts on “SPEAKING WORDS OF WISDOM”

  3. My family is Presbyterian but we spent Sundays on road trips as family time with the fox terrier Sammy who at 5 pm sharp wanted to go home and snarled at us in the beck seat if we made any noise. 😁

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  4. Gosh, I vaguely remember Sunday School as a very young child. But looking back, it seemed to be an indoctrinating experience. Jesus turned water to wine, because he was Jesus. End of.
    With my own child I was very keen for her to get a secular view of religion, Christians believe that… etc., so she could make her own choices.

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    1. I’m all for making choices. I believe children need structure in their lives, guidance and something to believe in. I loved going to Sunday school and church until my own personal great schism. I think at some point we all question our religious choices if not our faith. My faith is as strong as it ever was; these days I choose to practice it from my home.

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      1. Structure, I agree, but not necessarily religion. I don’t think the two are synonymous. You can certainly have one without the other. I mean, look at me. I am a confirmed atheist but have stronger values than most.

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  5. It is written that from children we shall hear the truth, no?
    Heartstrings plucked with this one, cara.

    As for me…only one place fit for a Hell-enas!
    At least the word around is that the music down there is devilishly good!

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  7. Thank you for sharing this with us, Nancy. I still remember attending Sunday School. I belonged to the Scripture Union and then an organisation for teens known as the Covenanters. I don’t know if they exist any more. I live next door to an abandoned church and a short walk from another. That’s the way it is in the UK today, sadly.

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    1. A lot of churches here have been “absorbed” by other churches. Many closings; it’s unfortunate to see some of the beautiful houses of worship with shuttered windows and locked doors. A sign of the times, I’m afraid. Thank you for your comments, Keith. πŸ˜‡

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  11. That is so sweet! But no, I’m not ready yet. I still have some living to do. I still have to meet all my grandchildren at Disney World this December. I still have to attend my great niece’s confirmation inDenmark this April. Now this will give you laugh: early on, raised Baptist – became Lutheran when I was 14. Married a Lutheran in a Lutheran church (not in the UK). Occasionally attend local Catholic Church, as there are no Lutheran churches anywhere nearby. As the priest said, “…same-same.”

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