Liar, Liar, Pants On Fire

Written for Great Minds Think –
“Bête Noire: A Poetic Invitation.
Our hosts, Sarah & Rohini, invite
us to write a piece about our own
bête noire …. or ‘black beast’ ….
a person/thing feared, avoided, detested.

I cannot tolerate a fib, a falsehood, or a fake,
Anyone who messes up and denies the blame they make.

If you tell me “I’m on my way” when you’re still in your bed,
A tiny, simmering storm cloud forms directly overhead.

I do not want your tall tales, your excuses, or your spin,
Just tell me that you ate the cake and left the empty tin.

“I got stuck in traffic” or “The email went to spam”?
Save the elaborate theater; it’s all a great big sham.

Am I dealing with an adult who simply lost their keys,
Or a master of evasion spouting bullshit guarantees?

“It wasn’t me,” they always say, “The printer had a glitch!”
“My phone was on silent”; “I was stuck inside a ditch!”

“I meant to call you back last week, but I was very sick!”
You were scrolling on your phone so just stop acting like a dick.

I don’t need fancy courtrooms or a polygraph machine,
My spidey-senses tingle when the truth just isn’t clean.

If you spill the morning coffee, just grab a paper towel,
Don’t blame the shifting air currents or a hooting barnyard owl.

Give me the plain, unvarnished truth, however sharp or small,
Say, “I forgot,” or “I was lazy,” or “I didn’t care at all.”

I’d rather hear a blunt “my fault” than a polished, shiny lie,
Because honesty is simple …. and excuses make me sigh.

NAR©2026

This is “The Liar” by Ozzy Osbourne

Bête noire: A poetic invitation

^{Everything on The Elephant’s Trunk was created by me unless otherwise indicated, and may not be used without permission. Thanks for your consideration. NAR©2017-present.}