A few years ago, I wrote a story I really loved.
I knew I wanted to use it again today but needed
to chop off about 150 words to make it work.
I sure hope it’s as good today as it was then.
This is Friday Fictioneers and here is my story.

“Papa, you said we were going fly fishing! What’s taking so long?”
Eight-year-old Lorian stood at the entrance to her grandfather’s study. Arms folded significantly across her chest, she stared at his typewriter willing it to spontaneously combust.
“Listen, kiddo. I’ve got to keep one step ahead of that goddamn Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words? He says I don’t know the $10 words. I know them. But there are older, simpler, and better words. Those are the ones I use.”
Lorian knew not to tell Papa that her mother was reading Faulkner’s newest book.
NAR©2025
100 Words
This is “Havana Daydreamin’” by Jimmy Buffett
All text, graphics and videos are copyright for Nancy’s Notes 🖊️🎶, The Sicilian Storyteller, The Elephant’s Trunk, The Rhythm Section, et al., and are not to be used without permission. NAR©2017-present.

Dear Nancy,
I love a good historical fiction. Great sense of competition with Faulkner. Of course I had to look up Lorian. There’s another story there.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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That was quite a complex family with an unorthodox dynamic. I couldn’t imagine Earnest talking to anyone, even an 8-yr-old, in any other way. I’m glad to know you enjoyed my story, Rochelle. Thank you!
🕊️
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Nancy, I just learned that Hemingway had 12 grandchildren and it was cool to see Lorian (when young) featured here and I liked the feeling of competition between two great authors – also, you had me thinking about the difference with “$10 words” versus “older, simpler ones” – I am curious as to what the cut put content was….
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Yvette, thanks for a great comment; I’m happy to know my little story sparked such interest for you. Here is a link to the original story in its entirety: https://theelephantstrunk.org/2023/10/07/ketchum-idaho/
Thank again, Yvette.
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well thank you – and that version sure had a lot more – like the clothing and tomboy part of Lorian – it was nice to compare both – and as good as the extra details were – I prefer the version of 100 words for FF…
but it could be primary or anchoring bias (tendency to “anchor” on the first story version I read) hahahah
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Thanks! Either way, I totally loved writing about Hemingway and Lorian. He is a legend.
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🙂🙂
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Oh no, Mum’s cheating on him, literature-ally.
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Great comment, Iris!
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Oh, that last line is so good, Nancy! You did well. The word count is certainly the challenge. 🙂
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A nip here, a tuck there, every word I could spare was cut. You’re right, Brenda; the word count is the challenge! Thanks so much for a great comment!
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I enjoyed your story, Nancy. Hemingway is one of my faves, Good writing!
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One of my favorites too, Susan! I’m glad to know you enjoyed my story. Thanks very much.
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Perfect story for the prompt. Got a link to the original?
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Thanks very much, Jodi. Here’s the link:
https://theelephantstrunk.org/2023/10/07/ketchum-idaho/
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i suppose it must be over $10 now due to inflation. 🙂
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For sure! You’d be quite right!
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Just like the man himself, you made every word count. Tracey
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Thank you, Tracey. It truly was one of my favorite stories.
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Was the mother reading A Rose for Emily?
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Perhaps. That info was not included in the 150 words that got chopped!
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Well done! Every word a gem.
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Lovely comment! Thanks so much, my dear D!
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You’ve captured the emotions of both the pretentious girl and the ‘earnest’ writer superbly, Nancy 📃😍🌏
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Thank you for an excellent soundtrack, dear Ivor! 🥰🌍🎶📖💛✍🏼
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An oldie but a goodie, Nancy 🎶😍🌏
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You cut back about 150 words and still had a fantabulous story! Way to go, Sista! Wonderful tune to go with.
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Oh, thank you, mon amie! I really hated chopping those words but I felt the story fit the photo so well.
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I bet you dd. But you did it just right!
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neat!
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Thanks, Di!
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Nice twist at the end and the song is perfect.
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Thanks very much, Ernie!
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Seems the $10 words may be worth something after all. Great story
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Lovely comment ….. thank you, Neil.
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Lovely story Nancy
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Grazie, cara Sadje.
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My pleasure
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Poor Lorian. You have brought out the uncomfortable conflict she is experiencing. Great little story, I am sure the cut back off words has tightened the emotions.
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Thanks very much, James.
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