Short Story

Dinner Out

Nancy's Notes 🖊️🎶

This is The Unicorn Challenge
where we are asked to be creative
in 250 words or less, with this photo
as our inspiration. Here is my story.

© Ayr/Gray

The smell of old cooking oil reheated too many times stuck in his throat and clung to every inch of the Chinese food takeout joint. He hated being here, his uncomfortable demeanor only making him feel ridiculously out of place. And why were there only two tables in the whole shop when there was clearly room for more. He felt naked, center stage, all eyes on him yet no one paid him any attention.

How the hell did he let himself get roped into this? His granddaughter, a 15 year old package of rebellion and maladjustment, talked him into a dinner out. He didn’t like eating anywhere but at home but he realized in the fourteen years since she was in his care, he’d never taken his granddaughter out to eat, not even for an ice cream.

He wondered if he resented her. In truth it was his daughter, the girl’s mother, he resented for running off like she did and leaving her year old tot with him. What kind of mother does that? One just a kid herself, stuck with an unwanted baby and a desperate need to be a teenager. Well, she took off one night and never came back.

Now, here he sat, waiting for this willful girl who was too much like her mother for her own good to return from the toilet. She’d been in there far too long and he sat staring at his past knowing she’d run off, leaving him alone again.

NAR
250 Words

The Unicorn Challenge-29/03/24

This is Del Shannon with “Runaway”

All text, graphics and videos are copyright for The Sicilian Storyteller, The Elephant’s Trunk and The Rhythm Section and is not for use by anyone without permission. NAR©2017-present.

41 thoughts on “Dinner Out”

  4. good flash fiction introduces us to engaging characters and situations, there is an arc and at the end, a pay off… we are happy for their success or sad for their loss

    better flash fiction introduces characters and situations that are common enough for the Reader to understand, if not identify with and the Reader feels they have learned something for the experience

    this is the third level, where we are tricked into becoming involved (we sense a bad thing coming up) and then the simple protagonist with a straightforward problem refuses to be so simple…

    good story, yo

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  7. Oh what a tragic story. I feel so sorry for him losing his daughter and now this. I hope she’s just taking longer than anticipated in the bathroom and will come back soon. Life has dealt him some tough cards. You’ve created him so convincingly. I like that you’ve given him some depth – a mix of good and bad qualities. Hard to do in the word limit, but it adds so much credibility to his character. And two brilliant stories!! You must be enjoying the extra bit of inspiration you’re getting this week.

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    1. It may sound old school but Easter weekend, especially Good Friday, is time I set aside to reflect and (hopefully) be inspired. It’s not easy these days when we are bombarded by social media at every turn. Don’t tell anyone but after a cursory glance, I deleted 67 emails on Friday. That felt so good!

      Thank you, Margaret, for your comments today. I’m finding lately that I’m more grounded and a bit more peaceful in my old age and take full advantage of whatever inspiration comes my way.

      Delighted you enjoyed my two stories this week. I’ll try not to make a habit of it!

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      1. Taking some time for reflection at Easter sounds like a wonderful idea – nothing wrong with old school.And it obviously did inspire you. I’m cheering for your little act of rebellion and my lips are sealed about those 67 emails. 🤭

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  8. Great sensory descriptions, Nancy, and a good story.
    I guess understanding teenage girls wasn’t his super-power.
    I can’t help wanting to give him a good slap, though.
    Then again, making the reader feel is the mark of a successful story. 😉

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    1. The thing I think we need to remember (and what I was hoping to convey) is that life has not been fair to anyone in this little vignette. No one’s life turned out the way they’d hoped. Is the man responsible for both his daughter and granddaughter’s willfulness and wild behavior? We don’t have the answers.

      For every encounter we have with other people, there are always at least two sides to the story.

      Thank you for sharing your thoughts today, Jenne, and for your ever-gracious comments. 😌

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