A solitary man sat huddled in the corner of the church pew, thinking, praying, pondering his next move, occasionally glancing at the little light above the confessional door indicating that a priest was available to listen, to advise, to absolve; rubbing his chafed neck, the man looked down at his Roman collar now resting on the pew next to him, as he contemplated how many years it had been since his ordination, how many baptisms he had performed, weddings he had celebrated, funerals he had officiated – more than he could count.
He was a good priest – some might even say excellent – not perfect by any stretch but he was no thief, no murderer and the rights certainly outweighed the wrongs – all except THIS wrong; no one knew his secret so who was he hurting, he asked himself endless times, always able to justify his actions for even Jesus said that the sins of the flesh were human and the easiest to forgive.
They were friends and saw each other every day at the hospital where they both worked – she as a nurse and he as a chaplain – respected, trusted and admired by staff and patients alike for she possessed an amazing ability to calm the fears of the sick and console the grief-stricken and he to provide solace in the form of prayer to the heavy-hearted and forlorn, to offer hope to the hopeless, to lay his hands on those in the throes of death and perform last rights when the end was upon them.
They told themselves they were drawn together by their mutual empathy for the suffering, which was true at first, but now the unthinkable had happened – they had become lovers, adulterers, for he was married to the church and she was married to his best friend; he was happiest when he was with her and yet this wrong which felt so right was eating him alive.
He glanced up again to see the little light was still burning brightly – a beacon to him in his bleakness – and he knew the three lonely choices before him: confess his sins, beg forgiveness and give her up, go on living a lie and continue their affair or abandon his beloved church not knowing if she would leave her husband for him; whatever his decision, the toll would be unbearable.
Making the sign of the cross, he rose and slowly walked toward the confessional, steeling himself as he reached out for the handle of the confessional booth but at that exact moment when he looked up, the little light had been switched off; knowing he missed his chance at forgiveness, he was despondent, his head hanging, tears falling as he turned and disappeared into the blackness of the night.
NAR © 2023
The Elephant's Trunk 
There will be more chances. You told this very sad story excellently.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Mimi, and pardon my delay in responding! These comments sometimes fall through the cracks. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and your gracious comments.
LikeLike
So sad. A man torn in so many directions, and none of them simple or easy choices.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s really difficult when a man wants a wife and family and still be a good priest to his parishioners. After all these years, you’d think some changes would have been made. Thanks for your thoughts, Di.
LikeLiked by 1 person
He certainly had a lot to contend with didn’t he? 😀 great six Nance!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, CA! Yes, he’s torn in many directions. It can’t be easy for the priests who would like to have a wife and family and still serve the church.
LikeLike
I knew a monk who ‘jumped over the wall’ and became a professional dancer.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well, I wasn’t expecting that 🤣
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁 He was a good dancer too.
He must’ve performed an amazing grand jeté to leap over his old monastery’s wall.
(btw, true story. It was how he described his escape from religious orders)
LikeLike
Hopefully there will be another opportunity to confess his sin and get needed advice on what to do next.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Time will tell.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, heartbreaking. What a terrible choice to have to make.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s an impossible choice. In this scenario there are no winners.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Did you know my stepfather is an ex-Jesuit? He was, in fact, the pastor of our parish in Chicago. He met Mom when he went to visit Dad at the hospital. Slowly, they became friends, then lovers. Long story, he left the priesthood, married Mom, they had a baby… Anyway, I know he had moments like this, because he told me. Great story!
LikeLiked by 1 person
No, I didn’t have any idea, John. That’s quite some story. You’ve just proven my point that priests are human and the restraints put on them by the church these days are unrealistic. Of course, there are priests who are content in life and happy with the vows they have taken. Good for them! I believe priests should be allowed to marry and married men should be allowed to become priests. Thank you for sharing such a personal comment with us.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Celibacy is such an outdated concept in my opinion.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Absolutely! There’s no reason to believe a married priest would not be a good priest. I believe he would be a better leader and advisor to the people of his parish, especially the married couples. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Jim.
LikeLiked by 1 person
A married priest would also be less likely to molest young boys.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sadly true.
LikeLiked by 1 person
What do they say? He who hesitates is lost…
Well done, Nancy!
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s what they say, Liz. I hope all is not lost for our troubled priest. Thanks!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very touching.
To be torn between two worlds is to be torn, no matter how logical or moral or legal.
Good Six, yo
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hard luck for this poor guy! Love the story. Well penned, Nancy, as always!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank so much, KK. I hope he find his way to happiness.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, such a moral dilemma. No winners.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nope, in situations such as this one, someone always loses. Pity, isn’t it?
LikeLiked by 1 person
The poor man, that must be painful. Excellent flash!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks so much, Vera! It must be extremely difficult for priests who want to keep their vows but also want a wife and family. It’s allowed in just about every other religious denomination and the priests are just as effective, productive and devoted to their parishes.
LikeLiked by 1 person
“Between the velvet lies
There’s a truth that’s hard as steel, yeah
The vision never dies
Life’s a never ending wheel, say
Holy diver
You’re the star of the masquerade”
Now… do you honestly expect me to have anything coherent to say, cara?
After you have masterfully paired in MEDIC your Six with Dio?
One thing remains…up the malocchio!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Of course I knew you would have something to say about Ronnie James! There’s no better complement to this vignette than that song. Good to know I didn’t disappoint! 🤣 🤟🏼 🌶️ 😎
LikeLiked by 1 person
A very hard choice
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very. Change is long overdue.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It sure is.
LikeLiked by 1 person