BUT I’VE BEEN THINKING

“Confused, Jesse? What’s there to be confused about? We have plans. I thought you were onboard and happy. What’s going on?” Sarah stood, impatiently tapping her toe. 

“That’s just it, Sarah. I don’t know what’s going on. We really need to talk about our wedding plans.”  Jesse paced back and forth, hands shoved deep into his jeans pockets. 

“Hold it right there, cowboy! Are you calling off our wedding?” Sarah’s eyes grew dark and angry. 

“That was not my intention, Sarah, but I’ve been thinking – how’d we get from a simple garden wedding to this elaborate affair you’ve got planned?” 

Sarah’s face flushed with exasperation. “Well, this is a fine time to bring that up! Our wedding is two weeks away and everything is ready. My dress, the venue, the flowers, the caterers, our honeymoon. Even the name cards for the tables have been printed!” 

“I know, Sarah, and before I realized it, our wedding turned into the social event of the year! You didn’t discuss any of this with me and I was right here the whole time. I don’t want a circus with a cast of characters I don’t even know or a stuffy office job to be happy. Your dad’s a great guy and offering to make me a partner in his business was extremely generous but I never wanted a power job and I certainly don’t want to be treated differently because I’m the boss’s son-in-law!“

With every word Jesse said, Sarah became more irate until she couldn’t stand it another minute. “Enough! You’re right, Jesse! I intentionally left you out of the planning because I didn’t want you trying to talk me out of my dream wedding! If you had your way, we’d be getting married in a barn in Nebraska. You’re so big on the truth, Jesse, here’s some truth for you. I’m glad your hillbilly family can’t make it to the wedding!” Sarah spat the words out angrily.

The room was silent for a long time. Finally, Jesse spoke. “Is that why you convinced my parents not to come to the wedding. Don’t bother trying to deny it; I know it’s the truth. Do you think I’m a fool, Sarah? Did you really believe I would never find out what you did? I’ve known for weeks and the only reason I never confronted you with what I know is because my mother, who is infinitely wiser, kinder and more forgiving than anyone I know, convinced me not to say anything.”

Instead of feeling sorry for what she had done, Sarah tried to justify it. “Jesse, surely you can see I was only trying to do your parents a favor and spare their feelings. They never would have felt comfortable being here.”

“Sarah, you know my background growing up on a farm. I come from simple, hard-working people. The smell of the earth, working with my hands, tending to the animals – that’s what I know and love. I always dreamed of having my own farm some day, waking up with the roosters and working in the fields. I dream of family barbecues with square dancing, homemade ice cream for dessert and a passel of happy kids running around. I’m an uncomplicated guy, Sarah. All I want is us, a family and a farm.” 

“Whoa, Jesse. Back it up. I have dreams, too. Ever since I was a little girl I wanted to marry a man as smart and handsome and rich as my father. I want a huge wedding at the Waldorf, cruising around the world on a honeymoon, living in a penthouse overlooking Central Park. Now you’re asking me to give those dreams up for life with a bunch of rugrats and a barn in the middle of nowhere? You can’t be serious, especially after everything my father has done for you.” 

“What the hell are we doing here, Sarah? Your dreams are all about the wedding; I did’t hear one word about our life together. I never asked your father for a thing, certainly not some hifalutin office job doing something I know nothing about. All I did was fall in love with the girl who shared my cab one rainy afternoon. Where’d she go, Sarah? My mother may understand you but I feel like I don’t know you at all.”

“Jesse, you’re not thinking straight. Do you really believe you’ll be happy spending your life milking cows, working the fields and going to state fairs instead of living in the lap of luxury with me?”

“You know what, Sarah? You’re right! I wouldn’t be happy – at least not with you – and you would never be happy with me.” Jesse walked to the door, then paused. “I’m sure some day you’ll meet a guy who’s just as shallow as you but that guy’s not me. Goodbye, Sarah. Thanks for stopping me from making a huge mistake.” 

“Hold on, cowboy! We’re not done here! You do not get to walk out on me, Jesse!” Sarah seethed.

Jesse grinned. “That’s where you’re wrong, Sarah.”

“You’ll be sorry, cowboy. You hear me? You’ll be sorry!” Sarah screamed as Jesse turned and left.

He laughed softly to himself knowing Sarah was wrong again.

NAR © 2023

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