Short Story

The Continuing Adventures of George and Martha

Written for Photo Challenge, Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie #507

Image Credit Sarah Whiley

“Do I need to point out the obvious, George?”

“I’d rather you didn’t, Martha, but seeing as how I’m a captive audience, I have no choice, now do I?”

“None. Clearly you’ve managed to get us lost 
. again.”

“Nonsense! I know exactly where we are.”

“Of course you do. It’s the same road we’ve been on for the last hour.”

“I’m rather fond of this road, Martha. I believe the beauty of the straight line is lost on most people.”

“You are a blathering idiot, George. The only thing lost is us. Just admit you made a wrong turn 100 miles back.”

“Never! The only wrong turn I ever made, Martha, was the one down the aisle on our wedding day.”

“You are a beast and I loathe you! Turn the car around, George.”

“I will do nothing of the kind. I am the master of my steed and I say “Onward!”

“What you are is a master asshole, George, with about as much sense as that cactus.”

“And you, Martha, are a bellowing cow in the throes of labor.”

“You do realize we’re going to die out here, don’t you, George? The vultures are already circling overhead.”

“Oh, don’t be so melodramatic, Martha.”

“Look! There seems to be some sort of rest area up ahead. Stop and ask for directions, George.”

“Over my dead body, Martha! Over my dead body!”

NAR©2024

NB: This is my first story about George & Martha. They’re so much fun, I need to write about them more often.

This is Steppenwolf and “Born To Be Wild”

All text, graphics and videos are copyright for The Sicilian Storyteller, The Elephant’s Trunk and The Rhythm Section and is not for use by anyone without permission. NAR©2017-present.

Short Story

Driving Lessons

“Danielle wants to learn how to drive, Bob”

“Don’t look at me, Helen. Last year’s lessons with Vanessa nearly put me over the edge.”

“Well, I can’t do it! Ever since Marcia Morelli snatched that promotion for Real Estate Agent of the Year away from me, I’m spending all my time at work playing catch up.”

“That’s not my problem, Helen. Anyway, I signed on to coach Brandon’s baseball team this season, remember?”

“Oh, cry me a river, Bob! You’re the one who took an early retirement; your schedule is much more flexible than mine.”

“That’s right, I retired so I could do things I enjoy like playing golf  and going fishing. It’s important to stay mobile after retirement so we don’t become dust in the wind.”

“Well, if you can’t do it and I can’t do it, why don’t we get Vanessa to teach Danielle how to drive?”

“Are you out of your mind, woman! Vanessa’s been driving less than a year. She can’t take Danielle out driving! Can you imagine the mayhem when those two hit the streets?”

“At least I’m making suggestions, Bob. All you’re doing is justifying why you can’t do it.”

“Oh, Helen, save your breath and don’t look at me with such contempt. I’m right and you know it. I won’t idly sit by and watch both our daughters driving without an adult in the car. It’s out of the question.”

“You won’t? Oh, that’s wonderful, Bob! I knew you’d come around!”

“Now hold on there, Helen. I didn’t agree to anything.”

“Why, sure you did, Bob. You said you wouldn’t sit idly by while the girls are driving around without an adult in the car.”

“But I didn’t mean
..”

“Look at it this way, Bob. Danielle is used to being driven everywhere she goes. If you don’t teach her how to drive, you’ll just have to drive here wherever she wants to go. I’d say this is a win/win situation.”

“And how do you figure that, Helen?”

“Simple! By giving Danielle driving lessons, you’ll be doing your part to keep our insurance rates down, you’ll be able to coach Brandon’s baseball team and still have time to do the things you enjoy and you won’t turn into dust in the wind. And all it takes is just one daily one-hour driving lesson! You’re a genius, Bob!”

“I am? Yeah, I guess I am. Hey! Wait just a gosh darn minute, Helen!”

NAR©2024

This is Kansas with “Dust In The Wind”

This portfolio (including text, graphics and videos) is copyright for The Sicilian Storyteller, The Elephant’s Trunk and The Rhythm Section and is not for use by anyone without permission. NAR © 2017-present.