Short Story

Ewe Gotta Be Kidding Me!

Written for Crispina’s Crimson’s Creative
Challenge #50-2
. I chose Pic #2.
Here’s where the image took me.

© Crispina Kemp

Thelma and Louise were two sheep who lived on the same farm. They were BFFs and always stuck together, sharing secrets and laughs as they roamed the fields. One sunny afternoon, as they were munching on some sweet grass, Thelma nudged Louise and whispered excitedly, “Look over there! A newcomer in the field across the road.”

Louise’s eyes widened as she followed Thelma’s gaze and saw a handsome ram with a majestic set of horns, standing proudly in the distance. His wool was a pristine white, and his eyes sparkled in the sunlight.

“He’s quite the looker, isn’t he?” Louise said with a mischievous grin.

Thelma nodded enthusiastically. “We have to meet him!”

And so, the two good friends hatched a plan to catch the ram’s eye. They practiced their most come-hither poses and rehearsed their sexiest baas, determined to make an impression.

Later that day, Thelma and Louise trotted across the road and approached the ram, who was grazing peacefully. They introduced themselves with a flutter of their eyelashes and a seductive baa. The ram, whose name was Romeo, was quite flattered by the sudden attention from the two lovely ladies.

Thelma and Louise invited Romeo for a romp in the meadow …. an offer he couldn’t refuse. Just as the trio was getting comfortable, they were interrupted by a group of little lambs who were the spitting image of Romeo.

“Daddy! Daddy!” they bleated excitedly. “Mama’s having the babies now and gave us a message for you. She said you better leave these floozy ewesies alone and come up to the barn lickety-split or you’ll be sharing a bunk with the sheepdog from now on!”

Romeo smiled sheepishly at Thelma and Louise and with a wink of an eye, took off with his kids prancing happily behind him.

Deflated, the two jilted ewes slowly walked back across the road and resumed munching on sweet grass, no doubt bemoaning the ram that got away.


NAR©2025

I was all set to play Judy Garland’s “The Man Who Got Away” when I came across this little nugget and I simply couldn’t pass it up. This is “Mairzy Doats” by Herman’s Hermits on The Dean Martin Show. Ewe saw it here first, kids! 🐑

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44 thoughts on “Ewe Gotta Be Kidding Me!”

  1. Now who could resist those sheepish faces? …obviously Romeo after a swift reminder, …loved the fun story Nancy, …and cringeworthy? Yikes!! ! I’m changing my nationality for this comment,..😉

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I think ‘cringeworthy’ is the word you’re looking for! Their record company released several singles that were big hits over there, playing on their ‘Englishness’ to the American market. None of them were even released here, as they knew they would make them a laughing stock. This is typical of that marketing 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I am sure you know that “Mairzy doats and dozy doats and liddle lamzy divey, a kiddley divey too, wouldn’t you?” are classic misheard lyrics of the actual lyrics, which are, “Mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy, a kid’ll eat ivy too, wouldn’t you?”

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I didn’t know that until maybe 30 years ago. I thought the song was based upon maybe a Scottish or Welsh poem and the language was Celtic or Welsh or Scottish or something. I felt pretty stupid when I heard they were actual English words that were [deliberately, apparently] mispronounced.

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  3. “their most come-hither poses”—haha. I’d like to see what those look like.
    “you better leave these floozy ewesies alone and come up to the barn lickity split or you’ll be sharing a bunk with the sheepdog from now on!”—Ewe, my friend, have the coolest expressions. Very funny, Nancy. This was a blast. Thanks.

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