Short Story

And Then He Knows – Revisited

The Sicilian Storyteller

Written for The Unicorn Challenge
(with a timely lead-in from yesterday’s
Friday Fictioneers). Here we are challenged
to be creative in 250 words or less
using the photo below. This is my story.

© Ayr/Gray
‘Domestic animals, even on leads, are banned from the beach from 6am – 9pm’

He walked on the beach with his dog just as he always did. He saw the sign but ignored it, happy to see someone had vandalized it. Damn rules!

He threw the ball but when the dog returned, he had a purse hanging from his mouth. He dropped the purse and ran back to where he found it.

Looking in the purse, the man saw a cell phone. Hers. Last call was to him. Chasing the dog, he saw a body sprawled on the rocks near the water.

And before he got any closer, he knew it was his wife.

A flood of questions hit him like a tsunami. What happened? Why didn’t he get her call? What was she doing here 
. not just here on the beach .
 here in Cannes?

She was supposed to be in Lyon finalizing the sale of her late mother’s apartment. Her mother died five years ago and for reasons only she could explain but never did, she refused to get rid of the place.

He quickened his pace to the body. The dog kept nudging her head and running around wildly on the deserted beach. The man looked at her phone again; there were numerous calls to someone named Roman. An unfamiliar name.

He heard a voice. “Monsieur! You are not supposed to be here with that dog! There are rules.” The local gendarmerie. Then louder, more urgently – â€œWhat have you done, monsieur? Do not move! Ici! DĂ©pĂȘchez-vous!”

And the whistles blew.

NAR©2024
250 Words

The Unicorn Challenge-17/05/24

This is “Who Let The Dogs Out” by Baha Men. Hey, hippie-ye-yo!

All text, graphics and videos are copyright for The Sicilian Storyteller, The Elephant’s Trunk and The Rhythm Section and are not for use by anyone without permission. NAR©2017-present.

33 thoughts on “And Then He Knows – Revisited”

  3. Solid storytelling for sure. Un-named man caught kneeling over the body, purse and phone in hand, a mysterious caller with a romantic name…

    Will a trauma-based Memento of the night before reveal the truth? Dun dun DUNNNN!

    Loved it!

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  4. Let’s hope her call history provides sufficient evidence to identify the real villain. I like how you extended your FF story here. What a great idea. And how amazing that this prompt so perfectly suited your first story! I love the ending of this one – ‘the whistles blew’.

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    1. Thanks, Margaret.
      Phones hold so many little secrets, don’t they? I wrote the FF version on a whim when the idea came to me at 11:30pm. When I saw the Uni photo, I did an eye roll and decided to start a new story from scratch, then ditched that idea and worked with the one from FF. What a serendipitous happenstance! I’m really glad I stuck with this story!
      Thanks so much for your always terrific comments!

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  6. Good story enhanced by the (narrative) threads running forward (and, perhaps, one or two) back.

    as a famous detective is famous for commenting on impending doom. ‘ruh roe’

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    1. Thank you, Fred!

      I had originally written a much shorter version for another photo prompt yesterday. Then this photo prompt came today with a similar tone to it and I thought, ‘why not just expand my first story?” And that’s what I did!

      Your comments mean much to me. I’m very appreciative.

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  10. The story lost nothing in the retelling, Nancy. The new dimension developed beautifully from the shorter story. The hint dropped about the apartment in Lyon, that ‘Roman’ – nice touch, a character in a story called ‘novel’! – and the final arrival of the gendarme fussing about ‘The Rules’ until… A great wee story.

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  11. Gotta say, Nancy, I never trusted that Roman, too smooth by half!

    And as for her and the apartment in Lyon, up to no good, I’d bet a month’s money!

    Intriguing snippet, m’dear…

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